|
Post by Bogey Bonocore on Apr 14, 2023 18:07:46 GMT -5
Welcome to Day....oh for facks sake, who cares anymore. This reporter has drank his weight in Mercury Cider this week, and at this point, a painful death at the hands of a grizzly bear would be more enjoyable than reporting on two more hack golfers bogeying 18 holes straight and fist pumping like they are Tiger Woods winning the Masters.... But wait! What do we have here? Speaking of grizzly bears, the Mercury Messengers are playing up one of their highly valued posh boys for this round. Cocaine Bear, not to be confused with The CIA Bear, has been mauling unsuspecting prey for years on The Brew Crew Circuit. The president has called in the National Guard to try to put a tranquilizer dart in the Bear, but, having no success, the Pentagon has called on a small town fireman with a knack for getting things done...even if no one can understand a facking word he says while he does it. And with that, Sean Prowsee, aka The Little Fire Boy, steps up to the first tee box, dancing and singing showtunes, not showing any signs of fear as the Bear growls and drools all over his balls....his golf balls that is. Well color this reporter surprised. He is strangely excited to watch this match. This reporter excuses himself to change his underoos as the pair prepare to hit their drives on the 1st... And the Cocaine Bear uses the high he has gotten from the drugs to pipe it 330 down the pipe. The Little Fire Boy must have been too busy playing with his hose instead of practicing, as he duck hooks his into the deep rough. The bear doesn't retract his claws and puts his second shot mere inches from the pin, leading to an easy tap in birdie and a quick 1up for the Messengers. Live look at Bear and Sean on the walk to the 2nd tee box
The Bear Mauling didn't stop there, as Sean couldn't stop playing with his small, but powerful, hose for the next two holes. A bogey and a par woke The Bear out of hibernation and a quick 3up lead after three holes. Just as this reporter was beginning to regret taking on this assignment on a beautiful Saturday when he could LITERALLY BE DOING ANYTHING ELSE, the Fire Boy turned on the siren on his firetruck as he drove donuts around the green on hole 4. With the green completely annilated, the Bear three putted from 5 feet, leading to a very disapointing par. This wasn't the first time Firemarshal Bill had putted on tore up greens (the guy plays a lot of municipal courses, after all), so he easily drilled his 18 foot birdie putt for his first hole win of the day. Messengers 2up after 4. Sean seems to have found his secret sauce. Destroy the green and Bear can't make a putt. So on the 5th green, as the Asspolissass Cider hit his bladder, the fireman whips out his hose and proceeds to urite right in Bear's line! What is a makable 8 footer for birdie has turned into a swamppy mess of yellow liquid. Bear putts. Ball hits the mini lake. Ball stops. Sean makes his birdie putt, and just like that, we have a match. Messengers only 1up. After two holes played square, the Bear has figured out Sean's pee games. With a birdie on 8, the Messengers go back up by 2 and after a tie on the 9th, the Bear and the Fire Marshal Bill go into the back 9 with the Messengers 2up. Full disclosure: At this point, this reporter was called away from the media tent by a very drunk Jessica Alba. We had a trist back in our 20s when I had to put on a fireman costume and pretend there was an emergency at bachlorette parties. Spoiler Alert: There wasn't actually an emergency. I would just take off my clothes and get dollar bills thrown at me by drunk women. Well, one of those women turned out to be a young Jessica Alba, who had yet to become the famous goddess that we all know. Well, one thing led to another, and this reporter had himself an Albatross...not once, but four times during that heavenly night. Anyway, even though this reporter now has gray hair and a beer belly, Miss Alba had never forgotten about that night...and she wanted to relive it in the Portable toilet off the 10th tee. When I returned, the duo was teeing off on the 13th hole, with Bear giving the Messengers a seemingly insurmountable 3 hole lead with 6 to play. But those last 6 holes would go down as maybe the most chaotic stretch of this already incredible Cyder Cup. It started with Bear trying to hump this reporter's leg, as he must have caught the pure, goddess like scent of Miss Alba. The Fireman took holes 13 & 14, cutting the lead down to one with four holes to play. He had a look of determination this reporter had never seen in a beer guzzling weekend athlete before. Except for that time John Daly scored an 18 on the 6th hole at Bay Hill. Bear got one back on 15 before Sean took it right back on 16. The Messengers had a one hole advantage with two to play. As this reporter's eyes widened with the excitment of the final two holes, Miss Alba appeared from behind a bush, wearing her skin tight leather outfit from her horrible TV show Dark Angel. But who really paid attention to that show, we just watched to see her in that outfit. I excused myself for another romp in the toilet. But not before I turned my head over my shoulder to witness the Bear drill a 38-foot birdie putt on 17, putting an end to the epic showdown between the Cocaine Bear and Fire Marshall Bill. Messengers win 2&1. But the real winner today was this reporter. Nine months later, Jessica Alba gave birth to a baby boy with olive skin and a full head of glorious hair. On his one month birthday, he picked up a Fisher Price putter and hit a 22 foot putt into the back of the cup. This proud dad promptly renamed him 'Birdie Bonocore'
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 18:08:10 GMT -5
Day 3 Cyder Cup match 3 This match sees Assassin Mark L vs Messenger Justin. Mark had tried to get the match played early in the morning in the hope that Scary Mary would still be in bed , anyone else's bed ,just not his. Justin not knowing about Scary walked out of the clubhouse without a care in the world. Mark was using mirrors to see if Mary was out there. The mirrors hadn't broke, so he figured it was safe to venture out to the first tee . Mark's grew more confident as he won 2 of the first 5 holes to Justin's none. Then it happened on the sixth hole, the sky went dark wolves howled in the distance, and she was Scary Mary looking like Jabba the Hutte in a tight dress showing all the wrong curves. Mark stammered, what you doing here. I hear there's new meat in the Brew Crew and I've come to try it Mary replied. Don't you mean men said Justin. I know what I meant retorted Mary and you could be the first, Justin faded into the crowd for safety. Then some clown in the crowd said Hey! Mark, maybe she wants some of your Dickens Cider. Yes I would have some said Mary. Then Mark was violently sick, that was a waste of a good breakfast. I shouldn't of said that, but there again Mark did trick me into marriage with it. Then tournament directors Art and Ben turned up with several security guards to remove Scary. They ended up getting a forklift to move her as 5 of them couldn't lift her. After this Justin won the sixth hole and was able to take the match 4 & 2 for the Messengers What about Snow White I hear someone ask. She having a week off leaving the Seven dwarfs to do their own thing. Seven dwarfs, seven days, poor girl. So what are the dwarfs up too. They were all feeling Happy apart from Sneezy because they thought he had covid, Happy was not feeling happy, he was feeling Gumpy. Great win Jason. Great report Chief 👏
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 18:09:25 GMT -5
After the massacre, on Day Two, things started to get more serious. The moon was full on the eve of the third round. At the players dinner, Mark Buenger sat in Ernie Copage's chair. Ernie was a good sport and sat further down the table. All seemed well, but Mark kept razing the rookie. Hazing a rookie is tradition at the Cyder Cup, but things went a bit too far and Mr. Copage felt disrespected. He demanded satisfaction! These two professional pixel golfers were teeing off against each other at high noon, and match play was the format. Mark sat back in his chair, which was supposed to be Ernie's, and thought for a moment. He said, You want satisfaction? You shall have satisfaction. Not only will we be playing match play tomorrow, but we shall take it a step further and make it a duel to the death! This was exactly what Ernie had in mind; however, he was hoping for pistols at dawn or sabers as he had been a master swordsman since the age of 12. Pen Knight hurried along and printed up the flyers. As a former hustler, he thought that he should make a few bucks off the hoopla. Everyone loves a bloodbath. None of the golfers got good rest that evening. Many of them took sides but didn't want to get involved directly. This was between Mark and Ernie, and it was going to stay that way. The course was jam-packed by 8 a.m. that morning. Nobody on either team ate breakfast together. By eleven in the morning, both golfers had made their way to the driving range, surrounded by their teammates that would play in round four. Ernie was hooking his shots, and Mark was slicing. Neither golfer looked comfortable. Pen Knight continued to sell tickets, making money hand over fist. Mark left the range first and stopped off at the bar for a shot of courage. Ernie had a pint hidden in his bag and took a swig. Both golfers were on the first tee by 11:57. Their names were announced at twelve on the dot, and Mark had the honors. Neither golfer looked at the other. You could cut the tension with a knife. Hole 1: Mark hit a beauty right down the middle. Ernie took his time and waggled more than usual. Someone sneezed in the middle of his backswing, and he shanked it into the trees on the left side. Ernie punched it out but was still 80 yards short of the green. Mark hit a beauty that stopped 4 feet from the cup. Ernie took another swig before he took his shot. He got unlucky as his ball hit the pin and bounced 32 feet away from the cup. The two golfers and caddies stayed as far away from each other as possible. Ernie lined up his putt and drained it for par, but that wasn't good enough as Mark tapped in for bird. Advantage to Mark the Assassin. Hole 2: Mark looked good and hit his ball right next to the hole. The pressure mounted against Ernie, and he shanked it. He took another swig and shanked his second shot. He hacked his way up to the green and made bogey. Mark, the stone-cold assassin, tapped it in again for bird. Two holes to Love in favor of the Assassins. Hole 3: Mark had the honors and crushed his tee shot once again. Ernie looked different. More confident and he smashed his ball 20 yards past Marks. Mark duffed his second shot this time and the crowed laughed. Ernie didn't pay attention and hit the green, but his putt would be difficult. Mark hit the bunker. Ernie had the advantage. Mark nearly holed out the wedge for par but would have to settle for bogey. Ernie two-putted his way to par. Assassins lose one back but lead by one. Hole 4: The first par 5 and both golfers were chomping at the bit. Unfortunately, they both played poorly and would have to settle for par. Mark still leads: 1 up. Hole 5: Mark had been guzzling down beers when nobody was looking, and he decided to relieve himself against a tree. Mark stumbled his way to a bogey on this par 4 and Ernie made par. Par was good enough and the match was all square. Holes 6 & 7: More drinking from both golfers and safe play. They both birded 6 and made par at 7. After seven holes Mark had blown a 2-0 lead and the match was dead even. (No Pun Intended) Hole 8: Pen Knight was still barking at the entrance, selling tickets and raking in the dough. The crowd was increasing, and anticipation was at an all-time high. Which one of these golfers would make it out alive? No time for pondering as Ernie had the honors. A difficult par three but Ernie would make par and Mark would make another Bonocore. The pressure seemed to be getting to him. Ernie has come back from 2 down and now leads by 1. Hole 9: Ernie hit it in the fairway, but he would have a difficult second shot as a tree was in his way. Mark hit a beauty. Ernie couldn't get close to the pin and Mark took advantage. Birdie for Mark and Par for Ernie. At the turn we are no better than when we started. Pen Knight has tripled the price of admission and the crowd keeps growing. Hole 10: Both golfers played it safe on this long par 5. Ernie had a 12-foot Eagle Putt but lipped out and you could hear the crowd groan a mile away. Mark tied Ernie with a bird of his own. Eight holes left and nobody had the lead. Hole 11: Mark had the honors and Ernie looked buzzed. Ernie shanked it into the woods, once again and Mark didn't waver. Mark pared the hole and Ernie made Double. Mark takes back the lead and the Assassins are up by one. Hole 12: Mark wasn't hiding his beer anymore and drank while making par. Ernie got his composure back and tied the hole. Mark still up by one. Hole 13: Cursed par 3 and millions of balls have been shot over the cliff and given a watery grave. Both golfers hit safe shots into the middle of the green and made par. Running out of holes and Mark the Assassin leads by one. Hole 14: Before Mark tees off, he needles Ernie about the scoreboard. Ernie gets red in the face but doesn't say a word. The needle works and Ernie make bogey while Mark pars. Mark leads 2 UP and the noose is tightening around Ernie's neck. Hole 15: The crowd is at maximum capacity and Pen Knight gives all the dough to Art. One thing Art knows how to do is to wash money clean. He takes the all the cash to his corprote offices and has his accountants bury it without cooking the books. In the meantime, both golfers make par and Mark is a 97% favorite to win. Still up by two holes. Hole 16: Feeling the pressure, Mark has an unlucky drive into the heavy rough. Ernie calms himself and hits it straight down the middle. Mark hits his second shot into the front greenside bunker. Ernie hits a dagger right next to the hole. Mark has trouble out of the bunker and makes bogey. Ernie taps in for bird and cuts the lead in half. Mark still leads by one with two to play. Hole 17: Another par 3 and Ernie just misses an Ace. The pressure is on Mark, but he doesn't notice and hits his shot within 3 feet. They both tap in for bird and Mark has the advantage. Hole 18: Pen Knight and the Brew Crew show up with the Local and State Police. Behind them is the National Guard and Armed Forces. About 400 armed men and women. The crowd is massive but not willing to die for entertainment. Nobody says a word. Mark apologizes to Ernie and Ernie accepts. They shake hands and both take a swig from Ernie's pint of whiskey. The crowd erupts in applause as both golfers get ready to tee off. Ernie has a 12-footer for bird to halve the match, but he misses. Both golfers make par. Mark the Assassin wins the match, 1 UP but nobody dies. Art Vandelay shows up as Ernie and Mark are walking to the bar arm and arm. Art Vandelay gives Pen Knight a nod. Some say they made over a million dollars on this Death Match Play Hustle. Great report, great match. Unlucky Ernie.
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 18:13:06 GMT -5
Welcome to Day....oh for facks sake, who cares anymore. This reporter has drank his weight in Mercury Cider this week, and at this point, a painful death at the hands of a grizzly bear would be more enjoyable than reporting on two more hack golfers bogeying 18 holes straight and fist pumping like they are Tiger Woods winning the Masters.... But wait! What do we have here? Speaking of grizzly bears, the Mercury Messengers are playing up one of their highly valued posh boys for this round. Cocaine Bear, not to be confused with The CIA Bear, has been mauling unsuspecting prey for years on The Brew Crew Circuit. The president has called in the National Guard to try to put a tranquilizer dart in the Bear, but, having no success, the Pentagon has called on a small town fireman with a knack for getting things done...even if no one can understand a facking word he says while he does it. And with that, Sean Prowsee, aka The Little Fire Boy, steps up to the first tee box, dancing and singing showtunes, not showing any signs of fear as the Bear growls and drools all over his balls....his golf balls that is. Well color this reporter surprised. He is strangely excited to watch this match. This reporter excuses himself to change his underoos as the pair prepare to hit their drives on the 1st... And the Cocaine Bear uses the high he has gotten from the drugs to pipe it 330 down the pipe. The Little Fire Boy must have been too busy playing with his hose instead of practicing, as he duck hooks his into the deep rough. The bear doesn't retract his claws and puts his second shot mere inches from the pin, leading to an easy tap in birdie and a quick 1up for the Messengers. Live look at Bear and Sean on the walk to the 2nd tee box
The Bear Mauling didn't stop there, as Sean couldn't stop playing with his small, but powerful, hose for the next two holes. A bogey and a par woke The Bear out of hibernation and a quick 3up lead after three holes. Just as this reporter was beginning to regret taking on this assignment on a beautiful Saturday when he could LITERALLY BE DOING ANYTHING ELSE, the Fire Boy turned on the siren on his firetruck as he drove donuts around the green on hole 4. With the green completely annilated, the Bear three putted from 5 feet, leading to a very disapointing par. This wasn't the first time Firemarshal Bill had putted on tore up greens (the guy plays a lot of municipal courses, after all), so he easily drilled his 18 foot birdie putt for his first hole win of the day. Messengers 2up after 4. Sean seems to have found his secret sauce. Destroy the green and Bear can't make a putt. So on the 5th green, as the Asspolissass Cider hit his bladder, the fireman whips out his hose and proceeds to urite right in Bear's line! What is a makable 8 footer for birdie has turned into a swamppy mess of yellow liquid. Bear putts. Ball hits the mini lake. Ball stops. Sean makes his birdie putt, and just like that, we have a match. Messengers only 1up. After two holes played square, the Bear has figured out Sean's pee games. With a birdie on 8, the Messengers go back up by 2 and after a tie on the 9th, the Bear and the Fire Marshal Bill go into the back 9 with the Messengers 2up. Full disclosure: At this point, this reporter was called away from the media tent by a very drunk Jessica Alba. We had a trist back in our 20s when I had to put on a fireman costume and pretend there was an emergency at bachlorette parties. Spoiler Alert: There wasn't actually an emergency. I would just take off my clothes and get dollar bills thrown at me by drunk women. Well, one of those women turned out to be a young Jessica Alba, who had yet to become the famous goddess that we all know. Well, one thing led to another, and this reporter had himself an Albatross...not once, but four times during that heavenly night. Anyway, even though this reporter now has gray hair and a beer belly, Miss Alba had never forgotten about that night...and she wanted to relive it in the Portable toilet off the 10th tee. When I returned, the duo was teeing off on the 13th hole, with Bear giving the Messengers a seemingly insurmountable 3 hole lead with 6 to play. But those last 6 holes would go down as maybe the most chaotic stretch of this already incredible Cyder Cup. It started with Bear trying to hump this reporter's leg, as he must have caught the pure, goddess like scent of Miss Alba. The Fireman took holes 13 & 14, cutting the lead down to one with four holes to play. He had a look of determination this reporter had never seen in a beer guzzling weekend athlete before. Except for that time John Daly scored an 18 on the 6th hole at Bay Hill. Bear got one back on 15 before Sean took it right back on 16. The Messengers had a one hole advantage with two to play. As this reporter's eyes widened with the excitment of the final two holes, Miss Alba appeared from behind a bush, wearing her skin tight leather outfit from her horrible TV show Dark Angel. But who really paid attention to that show, we just watched to see her in that outfit. I excused myself for another romp in the toilet. But not before I turned my head over my shoulder to witness the Bear drill a 38-foot birdie putt on 17, putting an end to the epic showdown between the Cocaine Bear and Fire Marshall Bill. Messengers win 2&1. But the real winner today was this reporter. Nine months later, Jessica Alba gave birth to a baby boy with olive skin and a full head of glorious hair. On his one month birthday, he picked up a Fisher Price putter and hit a 22 foot putt into the back of the cup. This proud dad promptly renamed him 'Birdie Bonocore' Great match boys. Great report VC and excellent win Chris.
|
|
|
Post by mbuenger on Apr 14, 2023 20:13:41 GMT -5
*Jim enters Jim: Hey boss! Heard you wanted to talk to me? Mark Lawrence: Yes Jim, what the fcuk was that in round 2? Jim: I know right?! Merida kept skipping over the group we were scheduled to cover. Never seen anything like it in all my years boss Mark: Yeah…not exactly what I was referring too Jim Jim: No, well then what? Mark: We had 8 other groups that we could’ve slid into our coverage. Why on God’s green Earth did you STAY ON THE TEE BOX WITH THE PEOPLE STANDING AROUND??!! This is not at all what I had in mind when you said you wanted to manage the broadcast yourself Jim (Mutters under his breath): I thought it was entertaining… Mark: I don’t even know what to say right now. And why did you spend that time showing Snow White on the broadcast? Jim: She’s a fascinating story Mark. Such a fall from grace. Beloved Disney Princess to exiled Cyder Cup host…riveting. Mark: But she’s been banned by both the Cyder Cup admin and our primary sponsor Dickens Cider. We shouldn’t be showing her on our broadcast especially when there is actual golf to cover *Ben enters Ben: What was with that round 2 nonsense Mark? Mark: I was just asking Jim the same thing Ben: Jim, if you can’t give us a broadcast that actually covers the golf match, I’m afraid this is going to be it Jim: I’m sorry, I thought I was perfectly clear. The broadcast was going to be about nothing. I thought it was great! Better than I envisioned actually. Ben: You watched them for 45 minutes stand around the tee box, dropping in to their conversations, and then, when they finally teed off, YOU PULLED THE FEED AND JUST GAVE THE SCORE. Mark: One could say you Yada Yada’d the best part Jim: I mentioned the score Ben: Now is not the time for jokes. These people come here to watch the golfers play, not talk about Tim’s date with Alisyn, or betting to tee off before called, or Snow White in the parking lot. Jim, you delivered two rounds so far with nary a mention of golf! And just mentioning the score in a Messenger victory could imply we favor the Assassins. Mark: Yeah Jim, I know this is what you wanted the broadcast to be like but we really should talk about the golf being played. If you don’t want the cohost that’s fine. If you don’t want the backstory, also fine. But the Cyder Cup broadcast should at least cover some golf. Ben: No Mark, I think we need to scrap the whole “broadcast about nothing” idea. We need all of those things to draw in the viewers Jim: Well what do you want me to do? Sing the details of the round to the people? A ballad about Messenger Scott Blade against Assassin Darren bubbsboy100. ? A back and forth tilt on the front that saw Scott with a 1 up lead? And winning 3 out of 4 holes between 10 and 13 before splitting holes down the stretch to give the Messengers a 3&1 win? Ben and Mark: Yes Jim: I don’t sing! Ben: Then we’ll find someone who will Mark: Ben, who are we going to find on such short notice? Jim (looking out the window): Well Snow White is still in the parking lot Mark and Ben: NO!!
|
|
|
Post by Bogey Bonocore on Apr 14, 2023 21:02:20 GMT -5
Good morning, and welcome to the final match of round 3 of this unbelievable event, The Brew Crew Cyder Cup. This reporter is still on cloud 9 from his trist in the portable toilet with Jessica Alba, so I might actually be kind to the two players I will be covering today. Although, on second thought, this Cyder Cup is coming down to the wire, and being that I am a proud member of the Mercury Messengers, I may be rooting for the demise of the Ass-Gas-Man on the course today... And that Asswhole is....Ken Lokosky! He comes into this match a heavy favorite, as he is a posh boy in Kinetic. But, when it comes to the Cyder Cup, all bets are off, as winning or losing usually comes down to how drunk you are when you step up to the first tee. And here comes Ken, staggering out from the bar. He looks blasted! This should be an easy win for the Messengers...but wait, who is he stumbling out with? Why it's Trevor Mendez, the player that the Messengers wrongfully trusted to pull off this upset for the ages. Well things are getting off to a rocky start here on the first tee as Ken is currently vomiting in a flower pot while Trever is literally peeing on his teed up ball. Trevor's moist ball would wind up coming back to haunt him, as the pee covered ball would roll to a dead stop as soon as it hit the fairway, leading to Ken and the AssMans taking a 1up lead. This reporter should note that he is starting to find it odd he has referenced urine in all four of his course reports. I have added a note to discuss this with my therapist on Monday morning. With a one hole deficit, Trevor tees up on hole two and proceeds to pipe his driver 300 down the middle. The only problem is that hole #2 is a par 3. This drunken mistake lets Ken take a 2 hole lead early on and it's not looking good for the Messengers. This reporter spots Trevor on the 3rd teebox with a house key up to his nose...without accusing any players of inappropriate drug usage, the results speak for themselves. 2 ties and a Trevor win follow, cutting the lead down to 1. After his birdie and win on the 5th, Trevor took a birdie shot on the 6th tee. Bad idea as he gave that one point right back. 2up Assasins. Another win on 8 gave Ken a 3 hole lead heading into the back nine. This reporter packed up his laptop, as this match is all but over...and Miss Alba is cooking me a prime rib dinner. She promised to wear an apron while she cooks...but nothing else, so I am not hanging around for this ass whooping when I got THIS at home. As I start to make my way to my car, I hear a roar come from the 13th green. Mendez has done the unthinkable....draining a 70 foot putt, only because his drunken self forgot to take the flag pole out. The ball was airmailed and if he didn't get a lucky bounce off the flag, that ball would have ended up back in his captain Ross' backyard in Tasmania. He celebrated by taking the golf cart for a ride. But, even with that lucky turn of events, the lead is still 2 up for Ken and the Assassins as they make their way to the 15th hole. I don't know what possessed me to take the drastic step that I was about to take. All I can do is attribute it to team pride and the competitive desire to win...at any cost. I put my laptop in the car. I grab my cell phone out of my pocket. I dial the phone number that I had remembered since my early 20s... Sexy, sultry voice on the phone - "Hey babe" Me - "Hi Jessica. I miss you babe. How's dinner coming along?" Jessica - "It's good, you big hunk of sexy man. I am wearing just an apron, as you requested" Me - "I can't wait. I am starvinggggg. I can't wait to eat the prime rib too! But, remember that bathroom on the back nine we cristened yesterday? Yes? Good. Well, um, I need you down here. We have a big problem, and we might lose the Cyder Cup. You are the only thing that could potentially stop this travesty" And with that, Jessica arrived. She strolled up to Trevor as he was passed out on the 15th tee. She awoke him. His eyes damn near almost popped out of his skull when he laid eyes on the beautiful goddess that kneel before him. She gently rubbed his shoulders and used a napkin to wipe the drool from his chin. She stood him up. She led him away. The returned in quick order, and Jessica bequeathed him the nickname "Minute Man Mendez". What did not take a minute however, was Trevor's incredible play on 15 to notch a win and cut the lead down to 1. As Jessica walked down the 16th fairway with the Minute Man Mendez, hand in hand, I saw a look in the old man's eyes that I had only seen once before. The previous night. On me. As I looked in the mirror. And just like that, the Minute Man had tied it up with two holes to go. And the 17th. ALL MINUTE MAN MENDEZ. Three holes in a row. First lead of the day. 1up Messengers. It was at this point I knew that I had lost my Dark Angel Jessica forever. After all, who was I? I had tied my opponent this very morning. Jessica Alba doesn't have time for losers and tie-ers. She wants winners. And Trevor.....oh Trevor...he was a winner. He drained another long birdie putt on 18 to put Ken to bed. And just like that, the Messengers were on top. I had sacrificed my dream woman for the team. To this day, I think about that prime rib dinner that Trevor enjoyed that night as I ate a Big Mac in my car in the McDonald's parking lot. I lost everything that night....but, I gave our team a chance at the coveted Cyder Cup. If that's not taking one for the team, I don't know what is. 9 months after Trevor's incredible Alba fueled come from behind victory, Jessica went back on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. In the last punch to my gut, she said the four words I dreaded to hear. They named him Minute Man Mendez Jr..
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 21:16:06 GMT -5
*Jim enters Jim: Hey boss! Heard you wanted to talk to me? Mark Lawrence: Yes Jim, what the fcuk was that in round 2? Jim: I know right?! Merida kept skipping over the group we were scheduled to cover. Never seen anything like it in all my years boss Mark: Yeah…not exactly what I was referring too Jim Jim: No, well then what? Mark: We had 8 other groups that we could’ve slid into our coverage. Why on God’s green Earth did you STAY ON THE TEE BOX WITH THE PEOPLE STANDING AROUND??!! This is not at all what I had in mind when you said you wanted to manage the broadcast yourself Jim (Mutters under his breath): I thought it was entertaining… Mark: I don’t even know what to say right now. And why did you spend that time showing Snow White on the broadcast? Jim: She’s a fascinating story Mark. Such a fall from grace. Beloved Disney Princess to exiled Cyder Cup host…riveting. Mark: But she’s been banned by both the Cyder Cup admin and our primary sponsor Dickens Cider. We shouldn’t be showing her on our broadcast especially when there is actual golf to cover *Ben enters Ben: What was with that round 2 nonsense Mark? Mark: I was just asking Jim the same thing Ben: Jim, if you can’t give us a broadcast that actually covers the golf match, I’m afraid this is going to be it Jim: I’m sorry, I thought I was perfectly clear. The broadcast was going to be about nothing. I thought it was great! Better than I envisioned actually. Ben: You watched them for 45 minutes stand around the tee box, dropping in to their conversations, and then, when they finally teed off, YOU PULLED THE FEED AND JUST GAVE THE SCORE. Mark: One could say you Yada Yada’d the best part Jim: I mentioned the score Ben: Now is not the time for jokes. These people come here to watch the golfers play, not talk about Tim’s date with Alisyn, or betting to tee off before called, or Snow White in the parking lot. Jim, you delivered two rounds so far with nary a mention of golf! And just mentioning the score in a Messenger victory could imply we favor the Assassins. Mark: Yeah Jim, I know this is what you wanted the broadcast to be like but we really should talk about the golf being played. If you don’t want the cohost that’s fine. If you don’t want the backstory, also fine. But the Cyder Cup broadcast should at least cover some golf. Ben: No Mark, I think we need to scrap the whole “broadcast about nothing” idea. We need all of those things to draw in the viewers Jim: Well what do you want me to do? Sing the details of the round to the people? A ballad about Messenger Scott Blade against Assassin Darren bubbsboy100. ? A back and forth tilt on the front that saw Scott with a 1 up lead? And winning 3 out of 4 holes between 10 and 13 before splitting holes down the stretch to give the Messengers a 3&1 win? Ben and Mark: Yes Jim: I don’t sing! Ben: Then we’ll find someone who will Mark: Ben, who are we going to find on such short notice? Jim (looking out the window): Well Snow White is still in the parking lot Mark and Ben: NO!! Well done Scott 👏
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 21:18:22 GMT -5
Good morning, and welcome to the final match of round 3 of this unbelievable event, The Brew Crew Cyder Cup. This reporter is still on cloud 9 from his trist in the portable toilet with Jessica Alba, so I might actually be kind to the two players I will be covering today. Although, on second thought, this Cyder Cup is coming down to the wire, and being that I am a proud member of the Mercury Messengers, I may be rooting for the demise of the Ass-Gas-Man on the course today... And that Asswhole is....Ken Lokosky! He comes into this match a heavy favorite, as he is a posh boy in Kinetic. But, when it comes to the Cyder Cup, all bets are off, as winning or losing usually comes down to how drunk you are when you step up to the first tee. And here comes Ken, staggering out from the bar. He looks blasted! This should be an easy win for the Messengers...but wait, who is he stumbling out with? Why it's Trevor Mendez, the player that the Messengers wrongfully trusted to pull off this upset for the ages. Well things are getting off to a rocky start here on the first tee as Ken is currently vomiting in a flower pot while Trever is literally peeing on his teed up ball. Trevor's moist ball would wind up coming back to haunt him, as the pee covered ball would roll to a dead stop as soon as it hit the fairway, leading to Ken and the AssMans taking a 1up lead. This reporter should note that he is starting to find it odd he has referenced urine in all four of his course reports. I have added a note to discuss this with my therapist on Monday morning. With a one hole deficit, Trevor tees up on hole two and proceeds to pipe his driver 300 down the middle. The only problem is that hole #2 is a par 3. This drunken mistake lets Ken take a 2 hole lead early on and it's not looking good for the Messengers. This reporter spots Trevor on the 3rd teebox with a house key up to his nose...without accusing any players of inappropriate drug usage, the results speak for themselves. 2 ties and a Trevor win follow, cutting the lead down to 1. After his birdie and win on the 5th, Trevor took a birdie shot on the 6th tee. Bad idea as he gave that one point right back. 2up Assasins. Another win on 8 gave Ken a 3 hole lead heading into the back nine. This reporter packed up his laptop, as this match is all but over...and Miss Alba is cooking me a prime rib dinner. She promised to wear an apron while she cooks...but nothing else, so I am not hanging around for this ass whooping when I got THIS at home. As I start to make my way to my car, I hear a roar come from the 13th green. Mendez has done the unthinkable....draining a 70 foot putt, only because his drunken self forgot to take the flag pole out. The ball was airmailed and if he didn't get a lucky bounce off the flag, that ball would have ended up back in his captain Ross' backyard in Tasmania. He celebrated by taking the golf cart for a ride. But, even with that lucky turn of events, the lead is still 2 up for Ken and the Assassins as they make their way to the 15th hole. I don't know what possessed me to take the drastic step that I was about to take. All I can do is attribute it to team pride and the competitive desire to win...at any cost. I put my laptop in the car. I grab my cell phone out of my pocket. I dial the phone number that I had remembered since my early 20s... Sexy, sultry voice on the phone - "Hey babe" Me - "Hi Jessica. I miss you babe. How's dinner coming along?" Jessica - "It's good, you big hunk of sexy man. I am wearing just an apron, as you requested" Me - "I can't wait. I am starvinggggg. I can't wait to eat the prime rib too! But, remember that bathroom on the back nine we cristened yesterday? Yes? Good. Well, um, I need you down here. We have a big problem, and we might lose the Cyder Cup. You are the only thing that could potentially stop this travesty" And with that, Jessica arrived. She strolled up to Trevor as he was passed out on the 15th tee. She awoke him. His eyes damn near almost popped out of his skull when he laid eyes on the beautiful goddess that kneel before him. She gently rubbed his shoulders and used a napkin to wipe the drool from his chin. She stood him up. She led him away. The returned in quick order, and Jessica bequeathed him the nickname "Minute Man Mendez". What did not take a minute however, was Trevor's incredible play on 15 to notch a win and cut the lead down to 1. As Jessica walked down the 16th fairway with the Minute Man Mendez, hand in hand, I saw a look in the old man's eyes that I had only seen once before. The previous night. On me. As I looked in the mirror. And just like that, the Minute Man had tied it up with two holes to go. And the 17th. ALL MINUTE MAN MENDEZ. Three holes in a row. First lead of the day. 1up Messengers. It was at this point I knew that I had lost my Dark Angel Jessica forever. After all, who was I? I had tied my opponent this very morning. Jessica Alba doesn't have time for losers and tie-ers. She wants winners. And Trevor.....oh Trevor...he was a winner. He drained another long birdie putt on 18 to put Ken to bed. And just like that, the Messengers were on top. I had sacrificed my dream woman for the team. To this day, I think about that prime rib dinner that Trevor enjoyed that night as I ate a Big Mac in my car in the McDonald's parking lot. I lost everything that night....but, I gave our team a chance at the coveted Cyder Cup. If that's not taking one for the team, I don't know what is. 9 months after Trevor's incredible Alba fueled come from behind victory, Jessica went back on The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon. In the last punch to my gut, she said the four words I dreaded to here. They named him Minute Man Mendez. Brilliant stuff Michael and a great win Trevor. Mercury Messengers 4thisweek 🥃
|
|
|
Post by IGolfBad on Apr 14, 2023 21:53:57 GMT -5
*Jim enters Jim: Hey boss! Heard you wanted to talk to me? Mark Lawrence: Yes Jim, what the fcuk was that in round 2? Jim: I know right?! Merida kept skipping over the group we were scheduled to cover. Never seen anything like it in all my years boss Mark: Yeah…not exactly what I was referring too Jim Jim: No, well then what? Mark: We had 8 other groups that we could’ve slid into our coverage. Why on God’s green Earth did you STAY ON THE TEE BOX WITH THE PEOPLE STANDING AROUND??!! This is not at all what I had in mind when you said you wanted to manage the broadcast yourself Jim (Mutters under his breath): I thought it was entertaining… Mark: I don’t even know what to say right now. And why did you spend that time showing Snow White on the broadcast? Jim: She’s a fascinating story Mark. Such a fall from grace. Beloved Disney Princess to exiled Cyder Cup host…riveting. Mark: But she’s been banned by both the Cyder Cup admin and our primary sponsor Dickens Cider. We shouldn’t be showing her on our broadcast especially when there is actual golf to cover *Ben enters Ben: What was with that round 2 nonsense Mark? Mark: I was just asking Jim the same thing Ben: Jim, if you can’t give us a broadcast that actually covers the golf match, I’m afraid this is going to be it Jim: I’m sorry, I thought I was perfectly clear. The broadcast was going to be about nothing. I thought it was great! Better than I envisioned actually. Ben: You watched them for 45 minutes stand around the tee box, dropping in to their conversations, and then, when they finally teed off, YOU PULLED THE FEED AND JUST GAVE THE SCORE. Mark: One could say you Yada Yada’d the best part Jim: I mentioned the score Ben: Now is not the time for jokes. These people come here to watch the golfers play, not talk about Tim’s date with Alisyn, or betting to tee off before called, or Snow White in the parking lot. Jim, you delivered two rounds so far with nary a mention of golf! And just mentioning the score in a Messenger victory could imply we favor the Assassins. Mark: Yeah Jim, I know this is what you wanted the broadcast to be like but we really should talk about the golf being played. If you don’t want the cohost that’s fine. If you don’t want the backstory, also fine. But the Cyder Cup broadcast should at least cover some golf. Ben: No Mark, I think we need to scrap the whole “broadcast about nothing” idea. We need all of those things to draw in the viewers Jim: Well what do you want me to do? Sing the details of the round to the people? A ballad about Messenger Scott Blade against Assassin Darren bubbsboy100. ? A back and forth tilt on the front that saw Scott with a 1 up lead? And winning 3 out of 4 holes between 10 and 13 before splitting holes down the stretch to give the Messengers a 3&1 win? Ben and Mark: Yes Jim: I don’t sing! Ben: Then we’ll find someone who will Mark: Ben, who are we going to find on such short notice? Jim (looking out the window): Well Snow White is still in the parking lot Mark and Ben: NO!! Well done Scott 👏 Pssst… Hey Ross… that was Bing
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 21:57:47 GMT -5
Pssst… Hey Ross… that was Bing So many good reports, so many good results, so many good narcotics 🤣🤣
|
|
|
Post by coggin66 on Apr 14, 2023 22:12:31 GMT -5
CYDER CUP VII
Day 3 - Singles - Matchplay:
Ben Tough (Messengers) vs David Stevenson, no Herron, no Stevenson (Assassins)
GUEST COMMENTATORS #4 - MOTOR RACING The Press Pool Offices
[ML] Where is that Dick Head? He is meant to be commentating on today’s match. [KW] I’m afraid he is not going to make it in time [ML] Why not? [KW] After yesterday’s interview, Dick went with Les and Princess Merida for some frolicking at the stone circle at midnight. Apparently, Merida moaned something she shouldn’t have and Les & Dick were turned into bear cubs. They won’t turn back until midnight tonight. [ML]: So who are we going to use instead? [KW]: The motor racing commentator is available. [ML]: OK. He’ll do. . . Voiceover Guy:
The following broadcast is rated PG. Parental guidance is recommended. We are now crossing to our live coverage of Day 3 of the Brew Crew Cyder Cup VII. Mr Head was unavailable for today’s commentary so we have brought in our Motor Racing commentator to present this show. [Intro Music plays]
[MT] Welcome to our live commentary stream for Day 3 of the Brew Crew Cyder Cup VII brought to you by Dickens Cyder. I’m your presenter, Moe Turnutt. Let’s go down to the grid for the pre-race formalities. At the Starting Grid:
Merida: My name is Princess Merida and I want to welcome you to Day Three of Cyder Cup VII, sponsored by Dickens Cyder. Special thanks for last night to my brave, little bear cubs, Les and Dick. Now, for the red team, it’s my favourite wee sassenach, Ben Tough. Ben enters the first tee arena as the Messengers crowd chant, “Come on you reds”. Ben does not look happy. Merida: For the blue team, it is the gorgeous hunk of scotch fillet, David Stevenson. David enters wearing his blue tartan kilt, as only a true Scot does, butt-naked underneath. He bends over and the Assassin crowd erupts in a chorus of “Ass Ass Baby”. Back in the studio:
[MT] This is a classic Red vs Blue battle like the Holden vs Ford days of old. The two drivers will battle it out over 18 laps of this Jacquard Speedway. They are getting ready at their starting positions on the grid. Five red lights. It’s lights out and away we go. Lap 1: It’s an even start and they finish the first lap crossing the line together. Lap 2: Ben does a lovely little under and over move and takes a one second lead as they cross the line at the end of lap 2. Lap 3: Ben has his pedal to the metal and stretches his lead to two seconds at the end of lap 3. Lap 4: David seems to be responding as he maintains the deficit in lap 4. Lap 5: Ben must be on softer tyres for this half of the race as he has stretched his lead to three seconds. Lap 6: David is driving well but he just can’t close that gap. Lap 7: Ben is pushing hard and has extended his lead to 4 seconds. David has to respond soon. Lap 8: David is holding the gap over that lap. Lap 9: Ben heads into the pits for the mandatory halfway pitstop, maintaining his four second lead over David. Lap 10: David has the softer tyre compound on now but they are not up to temperature yet and cannot close the gap. Lap 11: A mistake from Ben on that lap allows David to close the gap to three seconds. Lap 12: David’s pushing too hard and makes his own mistake and loses ground to Ben, who stretches the margin back out to four seconds. Lap 13: David’s tyre advantage shows in that lap as he closes the gap to three seconds. Lap 14: Ben is just controlling this one from the front as he maintains his three second lead. Lap 15: David’s tyres are falling off a cliff and Ben stretches his lead back to four seconds. He can’t lose it from here. Lap 16: Ben pulls out another second. Lap 17: Ben is controlling this one to the finish with one lap to go. Lap 18: And there’s the chequered flag and Ben in red wins this race comfortably with a five second margin. He controlled that one from start to finish and deserves to spray that champagne on the podium. That’s all from us today. I’ve been your host, Moe Turnutt. Thank you for listening. Epilogue
MarkL: What the hell does a 5-second win mean? It was a golf match. KenW: It meant Ben won 4&3 MarkL: So why didn’t you say that? KenW: Because that’s not what the commentator said. Also, I had beans on toast for dinner. MarkL: Why do I put up with this lot? THE END
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 14, 2023 22:27:49 GMT -5
CYDER CUP VII
Day 3 - Singles - Matchplay:
Ben Tough (Messengers) vs David Stevenson, no Herron, no Stevenson (Assassins)
GUEST COMMENTATORS #4 - MOTOR RACING The Press Pool Offices
[ML] Where is that Dick Head? He is meant to be commentating on today’s match. [KW] I’m afraid he is not going to make it in time [ML] Why not? [KW] After yesterday’s interview, Dick went with Les and Princess Merida for some frolicking at the stone circle at midnight. Apparently, Merida moaned something she shouldn’t have and Les & Dick were turned into bear cubs. They won’t turn back until midnight tonight. [ML]: So who are we going to use instead? [KW]: The motor racing commentator is available. [ML]: OK. He’ll do. . . Voiceover Guy:
The following broadcast is rated PG. Parental guidance is recommended. We are now crossing to our live coverage of Day 3 of the Brew Crew Cyder Cup VII. Mr Head was unavailable for today’s commentary so we have brought in our Motor Racing commentator to present this show. [Intro Music plays]
[MT] Welcome to our live commentary stream for Day 3 of the Brew Crew Cyder Cup VII brought to you by Dickens Cyder. I’m your presenter, Moe Turnutt. Let’s go down to the grid for the pre-race formalities. At the Starting Grid:
Merida: My name is Princess Merida and I want to welcome you to Day Three of Cyder Cup VII, sponsored by Dickens Cyder. Special thanks for last night to my brave, little bear cubs, Les and Dick. Now, for the red team, it’s my favourite wee sassenach, Ben Tough. Ben enters the first tee arena as the Messengers crowd chant, “Come on you reds”. Ben does not look happy. Merida: For the blue team, it is the gorgeous hunk of scotch fillet, David Stevenson. David enters wearing his blue tartan kilt, as only a true Scot does, butt-naked underneath. He bends over and the Assassin crowd erupts in a chorus of “Ass Ass Baby”. Back in the studio:
[MT] This is a classic Red vs Blue battle like the Holden vs Ford days of old. The two drivers will battle it out over 18 laps of this Jacquard Speedway. They are getting ready at their starting positions on the grid. Five red lights. It’s lights out and away we go. Lap 1: It’s an even start and they finish the first lap crossing the line together. Lap 2: Ben does a lovely little under and over move and takes a one second lead as they cross the line at the end of lap 2. Lap 3: Ben has his pedal to the metal and stretches his lead to two seconds at the end of lap 3. Lap 4: David seems to be responding as he maintains the deficit in lap 4. Lap 5: Ben must be on softer tyres for this half of the race as he has stretched his lead to three seconds. Lap 6: David is driving well but he just can’t close that gap. Lap 7: Ben is pushing hard and has extended his lead to 4 seconds. David has to respond soon. Lap 8: David is holding the gap over that lap. Lap 9: Ben heads into the pits for the mandatory halfway pitstop, maintaining his four second lead over David. Lap 10: David has the softer tyre compound on now but they are not up to temperature yet and cannot close the gap. Lap 11: A mistake from Ben on that lap allows David to close the gap to three seconds. Lap 12: David’s pushing too hard and makes his own mistake and loses ground to Ben, who stretches the margin back out to four seconds. Lap 13: David’s tyre advantage shows in that lap as he closes the gap to three seconds. Lap 14: Ben is just controlling this one from the front as he maintains his three second lead. Lap 15: David’s tyres are falling off a cliff and Ben stretches his lead back to four seconds. He can’t lose it from here. Lap 16: Ben pulls out another second. Lap 17: Ben is controlling this one to the finish with one lap to go. Lap 18: And there’s the chequered flag and Ben in red wins this race comfortably with a five second margin. He controlled that one from start to finish and deserves to spray that champagne on the podium. That’s all from us today. I’ve been your host, Moe Turnutt. Thank you for listening. Epilogue
MarkL: What the hell does a 5-second win mean? It was a golf match. KenW: It meant Ben won 4&3 MarkL: So why didn’t you say that? KenW: Because that’s not what the commentator said. Also, I had beans on toast for dinner. MarkL: Why do I put up with this lot? THE END
Very nice Ken. Great win Ben. Unlike Joe Biden I favour the classic by Kiwi/Aussie band Split Enz.https://spotify.link/Kzb9URAx0yb
|
|
|
Post by Loftyando on Apr 15, 2023 1:32:20 GMT -5
Cider Cup Day 3 Singles. Hi , I'm Mitch Williamson and today on WTF sports we have day 3 of the Cider Cup from the glorious Jacguard Causeway in downtown Jacguardsville. The match we will be concentrating on first is a clash of the tight ones titans involving for the Messengers, the beautiful Michael "bono" Bonocore And for the ass assins , the Greek God Leon " big hands" Anderson. There's no time to waste so we'll head right over to our reporter Bubba Young. "How ya hanging Bubba" "Past my knees still Mitch " "No Bubba, like I'm meaning how you doing" "Ahhh, sorry Mitch , yeah I'm hanging real cool dude" " Ok Bubba , how you think this match between Bono and big hands will play out " "sh%$! I'm at the wrong game again , awwww ffs, be at the tee soon as I can Mitch. Just fill in with some of your bulllshit and ill be quick as i can." " Ok Bubba, we cut to adverts. You there yet you f...ing goofball" " I am Mitch, oooooo boy am sweating like a fat lass in a disco but ready to roll" Hiiiii folks you join me at the tee where both players are getting some last minute advice and neck ons from their captains . Sean is in a nice blue cardigan but not a clue WTF Ross is wearing. Its red is all I can say but we'll try to get a shot of him later. Both tee shots are away and join me later for my report as I'm off for a burger at the van seems Mark has barred me from the reporters refreshment tent. 5 hrs pass.... " Hi Bubba, so howd it go buddy" Ohhh what a match we just had Mitch baby. Bonocore went off to an early 1 up lead when Anderson sliced his second at the 1st straight through the clubhouse window . He did the same at the 3rd and weirdly it was the same clubhouse window . So Bonocore was 2 up after 3. A few halved holes on the front 9 and Bonocore and the messengers were 1 up. Then the match turned. Anderson went off for a piss to the toilet and seemed to get a peck on the cheek by a fan dressed as snow white , whatever she did or said worked as Aces after Aces followed thereafter leaving the messenger Bonocore 2 down with 3 to play. By now Assassins captain Sean was laughing so much he pissed almost wet himself leaving Messenger Captain Ross so angry his head was the colour of his weird clobber. But...... Bono in the name of love searched out that snow white woman as big hands Anderson waited on the tee . Bono returned with what looked like a baguette down his pants, he pointed at captain Sean and said " we gonna do you blue boy". Captain Sean replied " hahaha, I doubt it french stick c..ck, its ours I tell ya" Then it happened. 2 Aces on the par 6s from Bonocore levelled the match . The blues were down, Sean was beating the earth , whilst Captain Ross took it upon himself to ridicule Anderson . With one hole to play the 2 players and captains said collectively " ahhh bollox, call it a draw . Now wheres that snow white bint. All Square. Art Vandelay Bogey Bonocore Loftyando I luckily didn't see this scorecard yet, so I was hanging on every word wondering if I could pull the rug out from under Loftyando . Sadly I couldn't get it done, but damn, I tried! Fantastic playing Leon. What a match! Well played Michael, it was a great matchup. That's 3 matches for 3 all square for me during this Cup.
|
|
|
Post by asyoudo64 on Apr 15, 2023 1:44:06 GMT -5
I luckily didn't see this scorecard yet, so I was hanging on every word wondering if I could pull the rug out from under Loftyando . Sadly I couldn't get it done, but damn, I tried! Fantastic playing Leon. What a match! Well played Michael, it was a great matchup. That's 3 matches for 3 all square for me during this Cup. Consistency Leon 👍
|
|
|
Post by TimB on Apr 15, 2023 4:57:03 GMT -5
Cyder Cup Report The trials and tribulations of a mouse's scroll wheel Alysin: Tim has asked me to do what is going to be a quick report on round 3 as I am still preparing the round 4 report as well. Tim is preparing to go out on the course and ranger a course for the Brew Crew thing you people have going. I still don't understand any of it. This is real people, playing fake golf, in real tournaments with fake reporters doing fake reports on the fake golf real tournament. And posting on a real message board in the real world. I'm confused. So it appears to me that the scores by Jason and Marc were close but by the looks of it the "Mercury Messengers won 4/3 Here is your real score card of the fake golf real tournament.
|
|