A KINGS RANSOMIt was a morning like any other. @pen Knight had driven down early with his burger van to get things set up for the day. The forecast gave a scorcher and with
Brenelan on the grill now cooking away there was hay to be made. Opening time soon. He took a moment to himself to drink in the calm before the storm. The most successful van around, 'nothing else like it' they said. His secret? One item on the menu; a plain burger. Simplicity is key. He knew this. It had been good to him. What a day. He was the King and this was his Kingdom...
Something give him pause though. A group was approaching from the other side of the car park. Pen noticed one of them was wearing a Claret and Blue football top with 'Harewood 10' on the back. He couldn't quite hear exactly what was said but from what he could tell this guy was
adamant that PC gaming was superior to consoles... @hammers1man . Beside him was the brightest blonde mop of hair you've ever seen poking out from beneath a British Rail Cap and resting on some Ray Ban shades... 'but that guy must be pushing 50' thought Pen, and he was, but he wore them anyway. As they approached he noticed writing on the guys t-shirt, 'Cogito Ergo Sim'...
longpole , no doubt. Finally rounding out this group of
arseholes was some stocky bearded guy wearing a cap to hide his bald head. All he said was 'I gotta jump off mic'. Now, this guy was a quiet one but he LOVED typing about the old days when things were better two years ago. Pen thought there was a problem with his speech and that's when he twigged... Norn Irish, of course! That
prick Hendomedes!
horusphoenix would have been here too - Pen knew it - but he had to something with his pup. Typical.
Longpole spoke first. Chatty bugger that he is.
'Oi Oi Guv'na!'
'Alright gents?'
'Cracking' set-up you get 'ere give us a cheeseburger please'
'We just do it the one way here, plain'
'Cam an! I like cheese on me burgah and I know these guys do too'
'One minute please'
'I'll pay you a few quid extra for it'
'Calm down, I'll be right back'
He steadied himself and went back to Brenelan. Brenelan had clearly overheard the conversation.
'Pen I can't do it. My wrist buzzes when I need to flip the burgers. How could I manage cheese on top of that?! It's NOT FUN for me!!'
'Calm down Bren, pal. They don't
really wan't cheese they're holding us to ransom. This is a shakedown'
'I thought the same' he lied, thankful he wouldn't have to cook by eye, ear and feel.
'Bren I want you to quietly and calmly phone the police and let them know we are being blackmailed. Go!'
As Brenelan made himself scarce Pen rubbed his hands nervously. His eye catching his wedding ring. Would she know? Would she even care? His mind drifted to early April...
'Who's that playing dad?' his youngest daughter asked
'It's a game. I'm playing!'
'Wow!! Is it new? It looks
really real!'
'Yes it's new and no it doesn't! It's awful'
'Sorry I was just-'
'And you can't play societies and no one's watching on Twitch and...'
'For CHRIST sake Pen she's just a child!'
No. He took the ring off and placed it on the counter. She wouldn't care. She didn't understand that there's one way to do things. These guys didn't understand either coming here with their outrageous list of demands.
He reached down beneath the counter for his (insert gun name here I don't have a clue lol).
'Lads, about that cheese'....
I swear to God this is purely in jest and a bit of fun and I don't want to offend anyone!