The Golf Club game and the Police at your door
Mar 4, 2016 13:21:48 GMT -5
daddyjules, Crazy Croc, and 6 more like this
Post by Harry Hates Golf on Mar 4, 2016 13:21:48 GMT -5
Recently, I had to answer my front door because of some serious knocking. I was playing The Golf Club and doing some crazed rambling because of the amount of bunker some punk golf course had. I mean, it was like there was the tee and then the green, and there everything else was bunker. It was a goddamn nightmare. Anyway, the knocking was so serious sounding that I didn't wait to put on my pants. I went for the door wearing only my wrinkled boxers and balmoral hat, cigarette dangling out of the corner of my mouth and holding my JD on the rocks. When I opened the door, I was surprised to see two cops standing there, one short and one tall. The cops were surprised to see that my boxers were so wrinkled.
"Hi," said the short cop. "We're here because we got a call."
"A call?" I asked. "What do you mean 'a call'?"
The tall cop stepped up a little. "One on your neighbors called because they were concerned about your well being. They said they could hear loud sobbing. foul language, and every screaming. They were worried that you were being kidnapped or possibly being murdered."
"That really gets me," I said, tapping the middle of my chest. "Right here. To think that they were worried that I was being disemboweled or beheaded. These wonderful bastards are definiately on my Christmas card list."
The tall cop asked, "Were you sobbing and screaming and saying, you know, cuss words?"
"Have you ever playing The Golf Club on PS4, Xbox 1, or PC?" I asked.
"As a matter of fact," the tall cop said. "I just bought the game for my own PS4. I haven't had time yet to play it."
"Well, when you start playing it, you will understand why I was screaming, and sobbing, and practicing my First Amendment right to speak in tongues and cuss."
"That tough, eh?"
A couple of tears rolled down my cheeks.
"The horror," I muttered. "The horror."
After an uncomfortable moment of silence between us three, the short cop spoke.
"So you're not going to hurt yourself or anyone else, right?"
"Oh hell no," I said. "That ain't in my DNA to do something like that. I'm a lover, not a fighter."
Both of the cops started laughing.
"Oh hell yeah," the tall cop said. "I know exactly what you're talking about."
"Bet you're going to have your girlfriend stop by to cheer you up," the short cop said with a wink.
"Of course I going to have her stop by," I said. "Why else do I bother having her around."
All three of us began to laugh out loud again.
"All right officers," I finally said after a minute or so. "Unless there are any more questions, or unless you are going to beat me within an inch of my life and plant evidence on me, I got to get back to my game."
I slammed the door shut and went back to my game.
So yeah, that was my question. I was wondering how many times this has happened to you guys. I'm pretty sure it happens quite often with the players of the TGC Tours. I was hoping that with the data I will be able to collect from this poll, I will be able to start a support group for fellow TGC Tour members. There is a lot of gaming rage out there, but golf game rage is as raw as it gets.
"Hi," said the short cop. "We're here because we got a call."
"A call?" I asked. "What do you mean 'a call'?"
The tall cop stepped up a little. "One on your neighbors called because they were concerned about your well being. They said they could hear loud sobbing. foul language, and every screaming. They were worried that you were being kidnapped or possibly being murdered."
"That really gets me," I said, tapping the middle of my chest. "Right here. To think that they were worried that I was being disemboweled or beheaded. These wonderful bastards are definiately on my Christmas card list."
The tall cop asked, "Were you sobbing and screaming and saying, you know, cuss words?"
"Have you ever playing The Golf Club on PS4, Xbox 1, or PC?" I asked.
"As a matter of fact," the tall cop said. "I just bought the game for my own PS4. I haven't had time yet to play it."
"Well, when you start playing it, you will understand why I was screaming, and sobbing, and practicing my First Amendment right to speak in tongues and cuss."
"That tough, eh?"
A couple of tears rolled down my cheeks.
"The horror," I muttered. "The horror."
After an uncomfortable moment of silence between us three, the short cop spoke.
"So you're not going to hurt yourself or anyone else, right?"
"Oh hell no," I said. "That ain't in my DNA to do something like that. I'm a lover, not a fighter."
Both of the cops started laughing.
"Oh hell yeah," the tall cop said. "I know exactly what you're talking about."
"Bet you're going to have your girlfriend stop by to cheer you up," the short cop said with a wink.
"Of course I going to have her stop by," I said. "Why else do I bother having her around."
All three of us began to laugh out loud again.
"All right officers," I finally said after a minute or so. "Unless there are any more questions, or unless you are going to beat me within an inch of my life and plant evidence on me, I got to get back to my game."
I slammed the door shut and went back to my game.
So yeah, that was my question. I was wondering how many times this has happened to you guys. I'm pretty sure it happens quite often with the players of the TGC Tours. I was hoping that with the data I will be able to collect from this poll, I will be able to start a support group for fellow TGC Tour members. There is a lot of gaming rage out there, but golf game rage is as raw as it gets.
The Golf Club Game and It's Possible Consequences
Oh my God, can you hear him!?!
He's screaming "Get out of the bunker! Get out of the goddamn bunker!"
He must be having some kind of combat vet flashback!
We're gonna have to take him down, WITH FULL PREJUDICE!!!