Peachtree Classic@Blackwater Bull Run
Nov 14, 2020 15:14:59 GMT -5
Art Vandelay, sandsaver01, and 5 more like this
Post by hmammoth on Nov 14, 2020 15:14:59 GMT -5
This week we welcome a new member to the kinetic tour course family with Blackwater Bull Run by HoneyBadgerHacker. Hold on a second, what the f**k is a honey badger. We have honey bees in Ireland, we have badgers in Ireland but honey badgers, what sort of sick and twisted Dr. Moreau decoded to combine those two creatures. I do not like the sound of that. You know what its like, a hot sunny summers day, you phone in sick because of some horrible contagious disease but suddenly just as you hang up the phone, it's a miracle, you are cured. To celebrate this amazing recovery you head to the beer garden of your favorite pub, to enjoy a ice cold pint of cider. But you are not the only one that enjoys the refreshing sweetness of the drink, the local gang of bee's always want in on the action. You try to show them away with a newspaper. You cover the glass with a beer mat to prevent any bee related drownings. You flick bits of jam at the backs of people sitting near by in the hope the bee's turn attention there. All in all, a inconvenience to you but nothing that would stop you ordering another 8 or 9 pints throughout the day. Now imagine it was a honey badger, the second that lands on your table, it's over, no more cider, it could down the pints faster than a group of students grant night, and try to fight it off, does the name Steve Irwin ring any bells. It's science gone mad I tell you. Holy shite, there is another one honeybadger64, that means at least 63 more. This could be worse than the killer African bee's from Brasil that destroyed Texas in 1990. This is scary, be careful out there guys.
Anyway, back to the course, there is a interesting story behind this weeks course. A long, long time ago, I think in the mid-seventies, the Blackwater was home to a rare species of cattle. It was also home to a rare species of herbs. These herbs attracted a rare species of hippies that wanted to live of the land, to be one with nature. Now, these hippies were not of the extremist kind, they were not vegans. They would eat meat but only if it died of natural causes, they would harvest the herbs but only for their own personal use and they would never sell it on because that could mean 10-20 years away from the land they loved so much. These hippies had some made some unusual lifestyle choices, some hippy experts say these choices were all made after prolonged exposure to the herbs, I am not sure about that, I think they just shared the common hippy gene that has been scientifically proven to be present in all hippy clans. The " these guys are f***ing loonies" gene. The Blackwater hippies in a effort to explore altered states of conscious decided that since the Blackwater cattle used to chew on the herbs, that one way to be truely one with nature was to drink milk straight from the cows teat. The thinking was that pure herbs, combined with pure milk would allow nature to enter their bodies free from additives and they would experience a high like no other. One dark and dreary day, Harmony and Serenity were taking a walk, enjoying all the beautiful colors and strange creatures that were surrounding them. In the distance they spotted a lone Blackwater cattle and feeling a little bit thirsty they decided to have a drink. Holding hands, they skipped merrily along a rainbow that lead directly to the creature. Serenity being the eldest and by hippy law this meant the first, got down on her knees ready to taste the pureness. Before she could a sip of the magical elixir she heard screaming. "Stop, stop,stop" she heard. Looking up she saw Sunshine Ray running towards them, " That's not a Blackwater Cow" he screamed. " That's a Blackwater Bull, RUN". And run they did, never to be seen again, leaving just disappointed bull behind. And that is the 100 percent true and accurate story of how this course got it's name.
Have a good week everyone, play well and enjoy the course. It might be worth carrying a weapon of some kind with you this week, it can be used to chase off honey badgers, hippies and a lonely bull. Good luck and have fun.
Anyway, back to the course, there is a interesting story behind this weeks course. A long, long time ago, I think in the mid-seventies, the Blackwater was home to a rare species of cattle. It was also home to a rare species of herbs. These herbs attracted a rare species of hippies that wanted to live of the land, to be one with nature. Now, these hippies were not of the extremist kind, they were not vegans. They would eat meat but only if it died of natural causes, they would harvest the herbs but only for their own personal use and they would never sell it on because that could mean 10-20 years away from the land they loved so much. These hippies had some made some unusual lifestyle choices, some hippy experts say these choices were all made after prolonged exposure to the herbs, I am not sure about that, I think they just shared the common hippy gene that has been scientifically proven to be present in all hippy clans. The " these guys are f***ing loonies" gene. The Blackwater hippies in a effort to explore altered states of conscious decided that since the Blackwater cattle used to chew on the herbs, that one way to be truely one with nature was to drink milk straight from the cows teat. The thinking was that pure herbs, combined with pure milk would allow nature to enter their bodies free from additives and they would experience a high like no other. One dark and dreary day, Harmony and Serenity were taking a walk, enjoying all the beautiful colors and strange creatures that were surrounding them. In the distance they spotted a lone Blackwater cattle and feeling a little bit thirsty they decided to have a drink. Holding hands, they skipped merrily along a rainbow that lead directly to the creature. Serenity being the eldest and by hippy law this meant the first, got down on her knees ready to taste the pureness. Before she could a sip of the magical elixir she heard screaming. "Stop, stop,stop" she heard. Looking up she saw Sunshine Ray running towards them, " That's not a Blackwater Cow" he screamed. " That's a Blackwater Bull, RUN". And run they did, never to be seen again, leaving just disappointed bull behind. And that is the 100 percent true and accurate story of how this course got it's name.
Have a good week everyone, play well and enjoy the course. It might be worth carrying a weapon of some kind with you this week, it can be used to chase off honey badgers, hippies and a lonely bull. Good luck and have fun.